I just read all my journals and realized I pretty much write one journal each month. So I guess this is Januarys.

I'm in the library at school. It's gay but at least not half as loud as it was the other day. But some girl is invading my personal space. I hate when people do that. The back of her chair is touching my arm. -_- Whatevvvvvvvvvvvvvvvs.

I've been thinking about post secondary situations so much lately. I basically have to though. Application deadlines for college is february 2nd. The sad thing is I haven't even thought about going to college. The only school I wanted to go to is in Toronto and it's a really expensive private school. $16000 for 6 months. (that girl who was invading my space just looked over and started reading this and then looked at me, I'm leaning next to the wall to prevent her back from touching me. I HATE nosey people that have no consideration for others) Anyways, I was really planning on going to that school, but my mom told me I'd have to stay in Toronto to find a good job. I'm definately not ready to move out to toronto by myself and live there for who knows how long. I'm only 18. I don't know how mature people expect you to be when you're 18. I may be an adult now but that doesn't change much. I'm not immature or anything, well maybe sometimes but not in general. I just don't think I'm emotionally ready to be on my own, if that makes sense. I've been with the same people my entire life, I've always had my parents and family there, I still go to school with people I knew when I was 4. If I move to Toronto all of that is gone. Life in St. Catharines will move on without me. I'm going to be in a huge city by myself where I know no one It's so scary thinking about it. So I'm thinking about taking a year off to grow up. I'd get a full time job for sure, maybe save some money, wtv. It's so much to think about. Grade 12 is so sressful

I have a fan of my art isus. She's in the grade 11 art class and she did a picture like mine. I'm flattered. I hate all the credit I get for those pictures because it seems like I don't deserve it. It was so simple for me to do and everyone makes such a big deal out of it. I don't want people thinking I'm great at that stuff cause I'm really not. I just got lucky.

There's only 4 days left of this semester. One more semester and I'm donnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnne, and when schools over... that means summers here
I think I have SAD, because winter makes me feel like shit. I think I'd be alot happier if it was summer right now.

I'm so hungry. I want 12:15 to come faster.

I think too much about everything. Things get to me too easily. I was going to write this jOurnal like an about me but I kinda got sidetracked.

I'm bored now though. I kinda wanna go to the benches but I know blank will be there, and I don't want to deal with her today, or ever.